25 Flabbergasted People Share the Dumbest Thing They've Heard Someone Say in Public

Author image for Eric Lund
Eric Lund
Feb 25, 2019 4:00 PM EST

People say incredibly dumb crap all the time. We're just glad that sometimes there's someone to witness it. If someone is alone in the forest, and they say something dumb, are they still an idiot? Yes, absolutely. In fact that probably makes them more stupid. Here are some instances of wondrous ignorance to scoff at.

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  • 01
    Text - littlewolf3 7.5k points 5 hours ago Him: "I'm vegan but I still eat chicken and turkey. So can I get the Cuban (a sandwich with pulled pork and ham) made with turkey instead of the ham?" Me: Sure, so do you want me to take the pulled pork off? Or make it with double turkey? Him: No leave that on Me: visible confusion okay?... He comes back later with his lady all mad saying he wants a new sandwich because he didn't know pulled pork was from pig and he doesn't eat pig because he's vegan.
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  • 02
    Text - The LadderGame 7.0k points 6 hours ago Standing at the foot of the Jesus statue in Rio de Janeiro I heard an American ask his tourist guide: Are these mountains natural or man-made?»
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  • 03
    Text - little_milkee 5.6k points 7 hours ago "I don't understand why I need to be on time for work"
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  • 04
    Text - 6 hours ago needaciggy 18.9k points On the bus full of high school students, "she's half Asian, half Chinese."
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  • 05
    Text - brtrobs 15.4k points 4 hours ago "Chickens are not animals, they shit eggs" edited 1 hour ago Said a friend who was trying to explain how she can eat poultry AND be vegan at the same time. Edit for the people who want to give her the benefit of the doubt: this woman is 24 years old today and I've known her for 10 years(we went to high school together). I once had to convince this woman that she is in fact 22, not 21. She thought she was 21 and it took me and a team of 4 other people and h
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  • 06
    Text - TheSmithyy 12.6k points 4 hours ago I was in line at a KFC when the guy in front of me asked, How many pieces of chicken are in a 15 piece bucket...
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  • 07
    Text - fakephillycheezsteak 11.9k points7 hours ago When I worked in Congress, I frequently gave tours of the Capitol. As I was wrapping up the tour, one of the constituents asked me to explain the the difference between the Capitol and the White House. Ok sure, not everyone is knowledgable about American government. I gave them a quick explanation and figured it would be sufficient. Nope, I was clearly mistaken. I then proceeded to listen to this person loudly proclaim that I*was incorrect and
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  • 08
    Text - 6 hours ago Wackydetective 9.3k points "Yooooooo0oo! HARRY POTTER ISNT A BOOK! ITS A MOVIE!"
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  • 09
    Text - smileedude 4.2k points 8 hours ago When I worked at an aquarium I overheard an American tourist say "wow, these penguins look just like birds"
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  • 10
    Text - valerianthegreat 4.9k points 6 hours ago Two grandma's talking in France. Well, there is definitely more wind eversince the fall of the Berlin wall. They were dead serious... I heard that as a kid and I still laugh at it.
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  • 11
    Text - CheapCaptain 34.8k points 7 hours ago My brother used to be a park ranger. One time a lady asked him how long it took for a deer to become a moose. He said about 7 years.
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  • 12
    Text - DragoneerFA 34.7k points 7 hours ago2 "Pigs dont have blood." My coworker trying to explain his belief that pigs dont have a heart, blood, or veins which is why they're "white meat"
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  • 13
    Text - 33.5k points 6 hours ago "Phones don't run on electricity, they run on batteries." -said in that condescending "Ugh, this is so obvious" voice
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  • 14
    Text - FultonHomes 31.7k points 7 hours ago I've probably heard worse at some point but I remember sitting in a Starbucks on campus and this girl was telling this guy about her trip to Italy and at one point the guy goes "So where do you want to go next?" and she says "I've never been to Europe before so hopefully that." lol
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  • 15
    Text - maybebabyg 24.1k points 6 hours ago "Breastfeeding is unnatural." - girl in my year 11 health class.
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  • 16
    Text - LucSteelewalker 9.2k points 4 hours ago Coworker at my old job while we were setting up for Black Friday "It's pretty crazy that Black Friday actually falls on a Friday this year."
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  • 17
    Text - 5 hours ago Jigleet 3.8k points "Earth is flat because if it would be round, then it would bounce."
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  • 18
    Text - JOLLHURN 23.2k points 6 hours ago "Since when has anyone died from getting stabbed?!"
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  • 19
    Text - Lord-AG 19.0k points 7 hours ago I heard two girls talking about baking when one said she wanted to try baking a bread at home but she didn't know how to make the crust of the bread. She also said she was thinking about baking the crust only because she liked it more than the rest of the bread. She truly thought that the crust was made separately.
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  • 20
    Text - Eudaimoniac_Dragon 9.1k points Does myself count? 5 hours ago S I was shopping with my spouse after our child was born. We were in the baby aisle. She picked up a bottle of baby oil, which prompted me to ask aloud, "Wait. Baby oil is actually for babies?" A woman who had been walking into the aisle laughed audibly and immediately walked away.
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  • 21
    Text - huazzy 3.5k points 5 hours ago While driving around Mexico City. Person 1: Wow Mexico City is huge... Me: Yeah, I think it's one of the biggest cities in the world. American girl: Nah-uh. Texas is.
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  • 22
    Text - oh-my 8.5k points 7 hours ago There is a starlet in my country who's famous - I don't know - for being famous I guess. Here are some of best-ofs (translated): edited 4 hours ago "I would bulldoze down church of St. Donat (built in 9th century) and build an older one" "Greetings to my parents, especially mom and dad!" "I'd love to have more self-confidence in other people" "I'm always included in mobbing. I have five mobile phones!" She never ceases to amaze.
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  • 23
    Text - 3 hours ago frawley28 1.9k points Her: Ivory comes from elephants, ebony comes from rhinoceroses Me: Ebony is a type of wood. Her: God, you're a dumbass. Мe:
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  • 24
    Text - Mom_is_watching 19.0k points 4 hours ago 2 A bit late to the party but I heard a woman explain to another woman how planes don't actually fly from America to Europe, they just hang in the sky motionless while the earth moves below them, until Europe appears and then they land.
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  • 25
    Text - 5 hours ago peterpooker 2.4k points "Does an egg get boiled before or after it comes out of the chicken?"
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nature facts funny stories ridiculous ignorant dumb science knowledge biology stories funny stupid
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